Let’s set the record straight: I have a fascination with presidential pets. Did you know that Teddy Roosevelt’s canine, Pete, once chewed the ambassador to France’s trousers? I certainly do. If you catch me at a cocktail gathering, I might just share that John and Abigail Adams owned a dog named Satan. And let’s not forget Martin Van Buren, who housed two baby tigers in the White House until Congress intervened and sent them to a zoo. I’ve even published books about Joe Biden’s dog, Major (before the biting incidents were revealed) and Mike Pence’s cherished bunny, Marlon Bundo.
This leads me to a pressing question: What is the Trump administration’s issue with dogs?!
It’s worth noting that Donald Trump was one of the rare presidents not to have a pet in the White House. Allegedly, a former advisor mentioned that Trump thought it was “low class” for Mike Pence and his family to bring their pets to the Naval Observatory.
Yet it’s not solely Trump; there’s an unsettling pattern among his senior political appointees. Before their confirmations, we need to clarify what’s truly happening.
The most infamous dog disliker is undoubtedly Trump’s pick for secretary of Homeland Security, Kristi Noem. Noem, the governor of South Dakota, seems to be the type who watches Old Yeller and roots for the rabid dog.
This past Spring, Noem published a book where she recounted shooting her dog, Cricket. In her own words:
“[Cricket] was ecstatic, dashing after all those birds and having an absolute blast. The only issue was that there were no hunters around to capture the birds she startled… My hunt was ruined. I was furious.”
Later that day, Noem allowed Cricket to roam freely in the back of her truck, where, predictably, Cricket leaped out and attacked a flock of chickens. You know, like a dog is prone to do. And for this, she was swiftly put down.
To clarify: Cricket was put to death because she was poor at hunting birds and simultaneously quite skillful at it.
Various alternatives could have been considered. Keep Cricket away from birds. Provide some training for her. Find another owner who has the time and patience for the first two options. Teach Cricket to play basketball (there’s no law against a dog etc. etc. etc.)
But for Noem, the first course of action was “shoot the dog.” There was also an incident involving a goat, but I’ll save that for my upcoming piece titled “What’s the Issue with Goats in the Trump Administration?”
First, I must clarify that RFK Jr. has denied consuming a dog.
However, when writing the phrase “RFK Jr. denies eating a dog,” it’s likely due to the fact that he gives off the kind of vibe that makes you envision him eating a dog. According to Vanity Fair, last year, RFK Jr. sent a photo to a friend showing him with a barbecued something.
Alongside the image, there was a message suggesting that the friend visit a restaurant in Korea known for dog meat. A vet informed the publication that the skeleton in the photo was indeed that of a dog, based on its structure.
Now, Kennedy has denied that claim—stating to Fox News that it wasn’t a dog whatsoever: “It’s a picture of me at a campfire in Patagonia on the Futaleufu River, eating a goat.”
Whether you believe the veterinarian or the man who claims WiFi causes “cellphone tumors,” one reality is evident: I might need to draft that “What the Problem Is with Goats in the Trump Administration?” piece sooner rather than later.
It gets more alarming. Dr. Mehmet Oz, who has been tapped by the president-elect to head the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services, has a track record that would make Cruella de Vil look like a PETA advocate.
In 2022, Jezebel reviewed 75 studies authored by Dr. Oz at Columbia University and discovered that his research resulted in the deaths of over 300 dogs. Setting aside the ethics surrounding animal testing, a whistleblower alleged that Oz’s research subjected animals to unnecessary suffering and breached the Animal Welfare Act.
And not only is the headline troubling, but the details are even more distressing. As per the whistleblower, one particular study ended with a litter of puppies being euthanized “with expired drugs injected into their hearts without any sedation.” They were subsequently discarded in a garbage bag alongside their living siblings.
Following an investigation, Columbia University had to pay a $2000 fine for violating the federal Animal Welfare Act.
Lastly, there’s Trump’s nominee for attorney general, Pam Bondi. It’s crucial to mention that Pam Bondi has not harmed any dogs. However, she was once accused of illegally taking one.
Specifically, it was a Saint Bernard named Tank, whose owners had to leave him at a shelter during Hurricane Katrina. After the storm, numerous dogs were separated from their owners, and amid the chaos, Tank was adopted by Pam Bondi from a Florida shelter.
Up to that point, that’s heartwarming! The issue arose when the original owners located Tank, and Bondi refused to return him. She even rebranded the dog Noah, which, while not illegal, is certainly a less appealing name than Tank.
A legal dispute ensued lasting a year and a half, after which the parties reached a settlement allowing for Tank to return to his rightful owners.
There’s something deeply troubling here. Notably, while Trump campaigned on the falsehood that immigrants were “eating the dogs,” his Cabinet choices indicate that their concerns had nothing to do with the supposed animal cruelty.
So, a word of caution as we approach 2025: When observing how individuals treat their dogs, don’t be shocked by how they might treat you.
