Public service, much like tumultuous relationships, can be an expensive affair.
Consider Pete Hegseth, who turned down his north of $2 million salary from Fox & Friends—which accounted for nearly all of the $4.6 million he earned in the last two years—for a modest government salary of $246,400 per year. This drastic pay cut raises eyebrows, especially for someone facing allegations of drunken debauchery, sexual assault, and financial mismanagement.
Supporting two former spouses, raising seven kids, and covering countless legal fees to effectively hide a messy situation can prove quite costly. Following his separation from his second wife, Samantha, Hegseth found himself burdened with a $25,000 credit card debt, a $498,999 mortgage on a $600,000 family home, and a 2005 Jeep Grand Cherokee.
While his finances might have stabilized, those sharp blue suits, star-spangled socks, and numerous jars of hair gel come with a cost, and he isn’t exactly Elon Musk. Joining Ned’s, the posh new club in D.C., would seem fitting for the newest power player, considering Leon Black was among the initial star-studded guests, but membership comes at a price of $5,000 per year along with a $5,000 initiation fee. Does he have the ability to expense it?
To make matters more daunting, he finds himself seating next to billionaire Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent at Trump’s Cabinet table, a man who amassed part of his wealth with a pivotal trade against the UK pound, leading to the catastrophic “Black Wednesday” that nearly dismantled the UK’s financial framework.
Moreover, Bessent has real estate holdings in the Bahamas, not in Tennessee. At least Hegseth can pick up some tips from Marco Rubio, the least wealthy of Trump’s selections, who has been earning a Senate salary since 2011. Unfortunately, it may be too late for Hegseth to master stock picking like Paul and Nancy Pelosi…
Pete, who has been unfairly portrayed in Andy Borowitz’s satire and (jokingly) accused of operating a tank while intoxicated and crashing into the Pentagon, might want to reach out to another new ally, David Sacks, who serves as Trump’s AI and crypto adviser, to see if he might have an extra wing available in his newly acquired four-bedroom, $10.3 million home in NW Washington. Plus, it boasts a 24/7 concierge for those late-night cravings. No need for a tank.
