This week has been quite eventful for the papacy. From Pope Francis’ bold appointment of a new Archbishop for Washington, D.C. (who has openly critiqued president-elect Donald Trump) to Nikki Glaser’s standout performance of the Conclave–Wicked mashup “Pope-ular” during the Golden Globes, it certainly feels like Pope culture is omnipresent.
However, not all the press is positive. While Conclave portrays an imagined Catholic church fervently striving for modernization, Pope Francis has been adamant about keeping the authentic church rooted in its historical ways. His Holiness has also garnered attention for advising a group of Dominican sisters that some of their colleagues ought to exhibit more warmth: “I have encountered nuns with a vinegar face and that’s not warm,” The Times reported him stating. “Vinegar isn’t pleasant, and speaking about nuns with vinegar faces is unnecessary.”
Yet let’s delve into this! The Pope effectively stated that nuns should be more cheerful. Sir, what you seem to be seeking are not nuns. What you want is Maria von Trapp. “Be more cheerful! Defeat the Nazis! Create charming outfits from curtains and embrace an almost obsessive passion for brown paper packages.”
(For the record, Maria von Trapp was never a ‘real’ nun. But we won’t split hairs over The Sound of Music.)
And he didn’t halt there. He further insists that the sisters cease their gossip: “To ask this of a woman is audacious, but we must progress and avoid gossip,” Francis added. Excuse me, avoid gossip? Do you grasp how challenging it is to be a nun? I have no personal experience, but from Sister Act, it seems to involve hours of donning the nun’s attire, some singing, followed by much fleeing from gangsters. And you expect them to accomplish all of that without their narratives to sustain their spirits throughout the day?
No way.
Here’s something I discovered about nuns that isn’t from a cinematic musical: they are, if you will, independent agents. The Catholic Church bears no obligation to provide for nuns. The sisters might have pledged to a life of poverty, but must cover their own rent, meals, and medical needs just like everyone else. Even if they are ‘married’ to Jesus, I doubt that his carpentry profession supports all his countless spouses. As reported by the Washington Post, many religious communities have historically struggled to finance the funerals of their deceased members.
So let’s ease up on these sisters. They simply lack the bandwidth to engage in frivolous antics or be whimsical clowns. Allow them their chats and a bit of sass. Furthermore, vinegar is delightful. A dash of balsamic enhances a salad; apple cider vinegar can help with blood sugar management. Sometimes vinegar provides just the zing needed to tackle a challenging day.
With that in mind, I will spend today sporting a resting-vinegar-face in support.
