Discussions surrounding online dating often converge on a singular notion: it can be a draining experience. One Reddit user, CampusBoulderer, articulated this sentiment well in a thread on r/AskMen:
“Dating apps transform what should be an enjoyable and thrilling experience into a tedious task. You swipe 50 times, jump to the next application, recycle your introduction that supposedly ‘guarantees replies,’ and follow the manual to turn matches into actual meetings. It feels reminiscent of my job application days post-2008, just launching my profile out there and crossing my fingers for positive outcomes. Technology has truly let us down here.”
So, what if Artificial Intelligence could manage your dating life for you? Recently, Whitney Wolfe Herd, the founder and executive chair of Bumble, proposed an innovative idea: AI-driven dating concierges that could interact with other AI systems, allowing users to bypass the most tedious aspects of online dating.
No matter your relationship standing, navigating communication can often resemble a complicated labyrinth. Could generative AI become our ally in fostering deeper conversations? Applications like Rizz assist users in drafting their messages for dating platforms, while tools designed for couples, such as Ringi, aim to help maintain a bond with your current partner. Additionally, there are services that facilitate romantic engagements with AI for individuals looking to completely disengage from human relationships, but that topic is best saved for another discussion.
We explored the rise of technology-driven dating, taking a moment to glance back at the present landscape of tools available for those in search of love.
Generation Z, generative AI, and the online dating landscape
The 2024 Youth Trends Report from market research firm Pion revealed intriguing insights regarding young people’s use of dating technology: 16% of respondents aged 16-25 in the U.S. reported using generative AI to help craft messages or bios on dating platforms, and 21% confessed to utilizing photo enhancement apps. Furthermore, a significant number expressed skepticism toward other users on dating apps.
Susan Trotter, Ph.D., a former therapist and dating consultant, notes that the dating scene has become increasingly disconnected since the pandemic’s onset.
“Many individuals seem to have lost touch with their social skills,” Trotter observes. “This disconnection has manifested particularly in the realm of online dating.”
Taking into account that Generation Z experienced both social isolation during the pandemic and rapid shifts in communication norms brought on by technology, it’s perhaps unsurprising that Hinge’s inaugural Gen Z report indicated that 44% of Hinge users were inexperienced with dating, and 56% reported a fear of rejection as a barrier to pursuing romantic relationships.
Harnessing generative AI to foster enduring dating connections
The idea of using an AI matchmaking service is becoming more plausible. If individuals are comfortable hiring dating coaches, then leveraging generative AI assistance doesn’t seem too far-fetched. One example, Luna, is an AI matchmaking service offered by Alchemi.ai that provides users with three matches each day.
In a statement to SUCCESS, CEO Oliver May emphasized that Luna targets those seeking long-term relationships. May stated, “Luna caters to individuals interested in forming lasting connections, making it unsuitable for anyone seeking transient flings or casual encounters.”
Utilizing generative AI as an additional perspective
When managing our communications, we’ve all sent messages we wanted second opinions on to our friends—whether regarding someone we’re currently dating or someone we’re interested in meeting through a dating app. Sometimes, using generative AI to draft messages might not differ greatly from consulting a professional like Trotter.
“My clients often reach out, saying things like, ‘I’m unsure how to reply,’” Trotter explains. “We discuss it together, analyzing the questions or comments and reviewing how the conversation was progressing.”
The ethical implications of employing generative AI in online dating
The realm of online dating is rife with scams and deceptive practices. Conversing with single friends about encountering “bots” on dating sites often leads to stories of fake profiles. Beyond dating apps, there are bots designed to initiate text conversations aimed at scamming individuals, as well as fraudulent social media accounts.
This issue predates the rise of generative AI in the past year but has grown more concerning when considering the risks of deep fakes or AI-generated individuals in video interactions.
But when every message is crafted with AI, are you truly expressing your authentic self to potential matches?
“I have some concerns about fully depending on AI for everything,” Trotter says. “Eventually, you’ll meet in person and, likely, go on a real date… if the process begins entirely with AI, what then happens during that face-to-face meeting? Authenticity and self-reliance are essential, and I believe AI may interfere with that.”
